New Year, New Start

As sappy and cheesy as it is, a new year can really mark a time of change and new things to come in our lives. But in all honesty we can make changes in our lives any day and moment in which we choose, small or big we decide how to live our lives every day by the actions we choose to make.

2014 marked probably the biggest year of my life, aside from the year it all started back in 1992. And while I haven't lived the longest life in history, it's been a life of ups and downs, triumphs and defeats, highs and lows....but honestly who's life isn't like that anyways? It's just how life works. Some experience so much in so little time, while others experience much less in much more time; it's what makes us human and individuals. Over this past year I've experienced so much, both good and bad, and I feel like I've learned and grown so much and yet at the same time it feels as if I've only just begun. Things that used to seem simple are now complex, and things that seemed complex don't seem to matter anymore. I gained a huge part of myself through my travels and yet I lost an even bigger part through what I endured. Does life always have to be this?....This constant scale of give and take, light and dark....

You don't know happiness until you've experienced sadness...the age old saying that encompasses life's timeline. There are those who choose to remember the good, others the bad, and some both. It's hard to only think of the good, when there has been so much bad especially when the bad moments are the moments that hurt you the most and left you with the scars that have helped you along your journey of growth. And yet it is painful to only keep hold of the bad, it leads one into a depth of darkness that people often lose their way in. So how do we know how much good and how much bad to keep with us? To that my friends, I do not have an answer. For you see, like you I struggle with this question each and every single day, and in every moment in which I think back on 2014. I think back on all the good that happened, and in truth it was such an amazing year; and then I reflect on the moment that changed my life forever. And I can't help but to think, what if things had been different? What if I could turn back time, and change one decision, would things have been different?...And while I know that there is little use in dwelling on these thoughts I can't help but have them.

2015, brings about a time of change. It is a time where I can begin to heal and recover. It is also a time for me to make change in my life. With the end of 2014 came the end of a chapter in my life, and with the start of 2015 comes the start of a new chapter. And while I do not know what lies ahead for me, I know that time will not stop and that with each passing day comes a new beginning, a new chance, and a new dawn.

--To the one who taught me to always be strong, and to fight with all I've got up until the very end. I love you forever and always, dad.--