Life's Many Blessings

I will be one of the first to admit that I often take so many things for granted. Just like now, my brother interrupted my typing of this post to offer me some sourdough bread....random but I will happily accept any kind of munchie that comes my way! ^^ hehe

Today has just been one of those days that started out like any other ordinary day, but as the day passed on my mood just became lighter and lighter. It's like when you are just happy for no specific reason, and you decide to have a solo dance party in your car driving home. It's moments like these that I remember that I have so much to be thankful for in life, and that honestly yes, even though I could ask for so much more, I am perfectly happy how things are now. And so as tacky and overused as it is the saying that we should "count our blessings" is so true, and by focusing on all the good things in your life it makes it a lot easier to overlook the "bad" things and it's easier for a smile to pop up on your beautiful face.

So the next time you're having one of those "I'm just not feeling the love" moments try remembering all the good things that have happened to you or that are happening to you; and if that still doesn't help to lighten your mood give a stranger a compliment. And I don't just mean say something just for the sake of saying something, I mean give a genuine compliment to someone, because just by giving that someone a compliment you may just end up making their day. And when you see that change happen in someone, where their confidence goes up, or their day has just been made a little better you will feel oh so warm in fuzzy inside. Trust me, that's one of the reasons I work in retail...because let me tell you I hate having to sell stuff to people. If you've ever experienced a pushy salesperson I apologize!! I hate doing that to people and I myself feel so uncomfortable doing it, I just honestly love helping people and when I can do that (even if it means sending them to another store and losing out on a sale commission) I've done my job. It's genuine interactions between people that really leave you with the feeling that you've done something to make that person's day more positive, and when you spread positive energy you get it back twofold.

Some people like to keep gratitude journals where they keep track of things that they're grateful for everyday, knowing me I'd skip days or even weeks, so I just prefer to share my thoughts here. And it doesn't matter whether people will or will not read this, because I'm not writing this blog in order to have thousands or millions of readers, I'm just writing so that I can post my thoughts somewhere....and if someone happens to come across this blog I hope that you can take something away from it. And so with that, dear reader, whomever you may be, I leave you. Until next time!

New Year, New Start

As sappy and cheesy as it is, a new year can really mark a time of change and new things to come in our lives. But in all honesty we can make changes in our lives any day and moment in which we choose, small or big we decide how to live our lives every day by the actions we choose to make.

2014 marked probably the biggest year of my life, aside from the year it all started back in 1992. And while I haven't lived the longest life in history, it's been a life of ups and downs, triumphs and defeats, highs and lows....but honestly who's life isn't like that anyways? It's just how life works. Some experience so much in so little time, while others experience much less in much more time; it's what makes us human and individuals. Over this past year I've experienced so much, both good and bad, and I feel like I've learned and grown so much and yet at the same time it feels as if I've only just begun. Things that used to seem simple are now complex, and things that seemed complex don't seem to matter anymore. I gained a huge part of myself through my travels and yet I lost an even bigger part through what I endured. Does life always have to be this?....This constant scale of give and take, light and dark....

You don't know happiness until you've experienced sadness...the age old saying that encompasses life's timeline. There are those who choose to remember the good, others the bad, and some both. It's hard to only think of the good, when there has been so much bad especially when the bad moments are the moments that hurt you the most and left you with the scars that have helped you along your journey of growth. And yet it is painful to only keep hold of the bad, it leads one into a depth of darkness that people often lose their way in. So how do we know how much good and how much bad to keep with us? To that my friends, I do not have an answer. For you see, like you I struggle with this question each and every single day, and in every moment in which I think back on 2014. I think back on all the good that happened, and in truth it was such an amazing year; and then I reflect on the moment that changed my life forever. And I can't help but to think, what if things had been different? What if I could turn back time, and change one decision, would things have been different?...And while I know that there is little use in dwelling on these thoughts I can't help but have them.

2015, brings about a time of change. It is a time where I can begin to heal and recover. It is also a time for me to make change in my life. With the end of 2014 came the end of a chapter in my life, and with the start of 2015 comes the start of a new chapter. And while I do not know what lies ahead for me, I know that time will not stop and that with each passing day comes a new beginning, a new chance, and a new dawn.

--To the one who taught me to always be strong, and to fight with all I've got up until the very end. I love you forever and always, dad.--

Getting In Touch

I finally found the time to get in touch with some of my closest friends today who are on missions. It brought back a lot of nostalgic memories, it also got me really excited to see them all again when they get home this summer. Today really made me think though that I really hope that we all can stay close and keep in contact with one another in our future years...makes me feel really old, which is so sad, considering I'm still in the 'prime' of life. Just makes you remember that life comes at you fast, and if you're not careful it can leave you behind in the dust. It's always said that you should cherish every moment as if it's your last, sometimes I think that's easier said than done. Or lately, I've even been wondering how you actually cherish moments in life...I think today gave me the answer I was looking for. I really cherish the friends that I call close and all the memories we've shared, and when I look back on all the times we've spent together I feel a sense of gratitude that we got that time together and that we'll all share those memories for the rest of our lives.

I think that's what cherishing means. It's when we create lasting memories with others that we'll never forget. It's also when we find the time to pause from our hectic schedules to be with the ones that we love. So take some time, pause, and think, when was the last time you spent time with your loved ones--and I'm not just talking about just seeing them and chitchatting. But the last time that you actually took the time to spend with someone you cared for, to create a memory. If it's been awhile, maybe it's time for you to consider putting some time aside to cherish this person(s); let them know how important their presence in your life is to you, and how much you cherish the time you spend with them.

YaY!!!!

FINALLY!!!!

I have finally succeeded in NOT procrastinating until the very end!!! Hehe...Just finished my online class....two days early! TWO!! Lol Might not seem like that much of a feat, but to me it means a lot...it means that my goal of becoming a highly successful college student this year is getting off to a grrrrrreat start! ^.^ *Happy Asian!!*

Ahh.....school....such a bittersweet time. It sucks the social life right outta me....actually no, that's work that does that! haha ;) School I actually kinda like being one of those 'study every waking moment' people....but then again I guess it does take a lot of my time away from other 'fun' stuff I could be doing. *Sigh* Growing up just isn't all it's cracked up to be....I miss being high school when I didn't have to worry about school work....back when I had absolutely nothing to do after school, when I could hang out with whomever I wanted to....*ponder* Yeah...I definitely miss those days.

Hope all your guys' days are going smoothly and you guys are having some fun here and there :).

煩惱...

時間真的可以讓一個人忘記全部的不開心的回憶嗎？若果真的可以的話，那要多效時間才可以呢？雖然我的年齡不是很大。 。 。可是我都經歷了很多事情。我真的有很多事情我忘不了。 。 。那我應該真麼辦？每次我一個人的時候我回想起我曾經發生過的事, 一些事會讓我開心的回憶， 一些事會讓我不開心的回憶。 。 。可是為什麼好像不開心的回憶比開心的會議多呢? 朋友沉靜告訴我若跟一個人只會看過去那這個人沒辦法向前走。我明白過去的事情我們不可能改得，我也懂我朋友說的話。可是。 。 。有什麼辦法可以讓我不再想不開心的回憶呢？希望有一天我真的可以放掉我以前得過去。開開心心的生活。

Missing

....Well it's official, the boys are gone. :'( The fact that I won't see them for two whole years still has yet to hit me...I wonder if it ever truly will. I look forward to the chance to write them and hear their stories and tell them mine, but it still won't be the same as physically seeing and interacting with them. We all say that we don't want things to change in these next two years....but we all know things will change with time, who knows where we'll all be two years from now. But I think it's not whether we'll be married, dating, moved out, etc. it's all about how much we still believe in the friendship that we established over the past years together. If we have faith and believe that bond will never be broken, but like everything else in life friendships require our attention, we can't expect to not put forth any effort and expect results, things fade over time...but they don't have to.

I'm so thankful to have the friends that I do, I can't imagine my life without them. I've known some of them pretty much my whole life, while others I've known for a couple of years, but we've all grown so close, it's like time is not a factor in how close we are. I think it's with these people that we can really be ourselves with, and it's also these people who will continue to influence our lives for the long run. Choose your friends wisely!

I'm just like everyone else....I want these next two years to fly by, so that we can get our missionaries back home and have everything go back to the way it once was. I'm sure that day by day the years will seem slow, but by the time two years has passed we'll feel that it flew by. Just like this past year in college, it feels like yesterday that we were all gathered around a campfire or playing sports. I can't wait for the day when we can do all the fun stuff we used to do....but until then I'll continue to tell my story and the story of those around me to you guys who won't be there with us...look forward to it! :)

Home and Lonely...

Home from vacation in San Francisco.... It's lonely here to say the least. Coming home to blaring heat, friends gone for months/years, and a 32 hour work schedule...not the best homecoming if I do say so myself. To my friends out abroad be safe and have fun, to my friends that are here in Utah...stay cool, don't overheat.

Summer is more than halfway over...meh! Not looking forward to walking around on campus in the blazing heat, especially UP hill...-.-'. My Cali trip was everything I thought it would be though! Nice cool weather and a lot of fun memories made! :) I can't believe that a week passed by so fast though...but it makes me excited for my summer plans for 2013...a whole summer of vacation! Now that is what I'm talking about! In fact it's a great motivator to keep my job that has me working as much as a manager without the pay of one -.-'.

On another happy note, I learned today that a part of my childhood is coming back to the present!.....*drumroll* Sailor moon is making a come back!! :D Yup that's right!! It's set to start next year in September, if the articles are correct.....WOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!! Nothing beats Sailor moon....NOTHING!!! I could watch that show forever and ever! *sigh* You've gotta love shows that you grew up with as a child :).

 School....just so you know the only reason I look forward to you is because when you are over for another summer I will have fun again, oh and I'll actually have stuff to do then, and not work as much ;P

First year no more!

After today my first year of college will be officially over!!......Haven't yet decided if that's a good thing or bad...you know it's great cuz I'm done with school until fall, but then it just means I'm another year older! >< (oh come on you know girls are sensitive about their age! ;P) Looking back on this year I've actually gotten a lot done!....Like I helped start a new club, I auditioned/got accepted into the Modern Dance Minor program, joined the Uinta Frisbbe team here at the U...funny thing though, all of this was achieved this semester haha where was I last semester? Oh right, I was a complete noob! Funny how now I feel like I actually belong here. I've also come to terms that in order to enjoy college as much as those fanatics that say college was everything they ever dreamed and more you really do have to get involved, and if you're not into that whole 'do everything and anything' kind of attitude make some friends who like to do stuff, it'll keep you entertained and you'll be dragged into somethings that you'd never normally do, but then you'll have a blast! So what am I doing during the summer you ask? WH-ell, first off I'm going to be working (hopefully more in the mornings than at night), and along side the work topic, I might get a second job! This second job would be an internship with a friend's dad here up at the U, bonus is that he'd probably be able to get me into med school! :) I know connections right!? XD haha I don't know of any summer plans yet as far as va-k's and fun stuff; ideas have been thrown around, but nothing final yet. Goals for the summer?.... 1. Make some bank. 2. Have fun. 3. Have fun. 4. Figure out what my majors will be. 5. Have fun. 6. Oh and have fun. Haha yeah there you go, those are my summer objectives XD lol. Some awesome plans there huh? But before I get to all the summer fun I have one last final....but I'm so glad to be done after this! I just hope I pass the f**** test! If I get a C in this class, oh you better bet your a** that I'm going to retake this damn class! I will settle for a B, but a friggin C!?!?! HELL NO!!!! College may be hard, but that hasn't changed my standards of trying hard and doing good in school....that and my parents would probably never let me live it down. -.-' *sigh* The hard life of an Asian huh? *JK it's actually a pretty good life, I mean I don't have to pay for anything, and by anything I mean: 1. Gas 2. Car insurance 3. Cellphone bill 4. TUITION 5. Most meals (unless I'm on campus and my mom isn't around XD lol) 6. The majority of my clothes I know. I'm a lucky chicky! ;) You're all jealous right now....as you should be! haha!! JK

2012 Finally...

*sigh* Well, this is the first post of 2012....:P My bad it's been awhile! But rest assured not too much has changed! So the new classes are going good! Much more enjoyable than last semester for sure! :) I don't dread going to any of my classes! Yay! hehe...social life hasn't changed much, although I have met more people up on campus! So you know got more connections and friends! ^.^ In my Chinese class I have befriended most of them (which is a good thing). Uh...my dance comp. class I also know a couple people, my hip-hop class I talked with one girl last time, so that leaves calc and bio that I don't really talk to anyone, and frankly I'm ok with that lol

The weather this year has been riDICulous!! It's been freezing cold, but with no snow..then suddenly we got this huge storm that dumped like 6 in of snow on us, then it was nice weather again, then stormy, then nice and one final storm. Past couple of days have been really nice, just windy :/ which is part good, part bad...good cuz it's still good weather, bad cuz we've been wanting to play frisbee XD lol.

Well I can't really think of anything else to blog about right now...lol *this is why I always wait til I have something I really, really want to say before I blog* but anyways I'll get on again soon, probly change up the playlist and what not :P Until next time!...

BAGH!!!

*Sigh*....so the new semest (yes I know I want it to say 'semest') has started....I really like my classes, but there are a lot of big changes in my sched this semst for example I have to be to school by 7:30 am, so I get on TRAX at 6 am, which means I wake up at 5 >~< Not my idea of an ideal morning...but the sad part is that waking up that early really isn't that bad except that it's friggin COLD in the mornings and TRAX is pretty full :/. So let's see here's what I'm taking:

CHIN 1020 and CHIN 2020 (there's a story to this)
CALC 1210
BIO 1210
DANCE COMP
---
(2nd session-starts Feb. 29)
ULTIMATE
HIP HOP

So that all amounts to 17 credits this semest! :)
So the whole story with the two Chinese classes is that hehe...so I took 1010 in the fall...and I enrolled for 1020 this semester, but I ran into my cousin who's in 2020 and suggested that I speak with my professor to move into the 2020 class-my teacher loved the idea. So I went to a couple classes and I found that I understood everything they were saying/learning, but my reading ability for characters was a little...haha weak :P, but I decided why not? So I am enrolled in 2020 now and no longer in the 1020, BUT since I have time in my sched for the class I continue to go so that I can still learn the vocab I missed and the characters (though I could review on my own at home) I just don't get a grade and I don't have to pay :) It's a win-win really hehe

The only class I'm hesitant about is my dance composition class...I know I'm a dancer so that should be y favorite class right??...Well it's not. -.- I guess this is why I never liked modern dance haha...it's too....I dunno....'liberal' maybe? (not really the right term) I've seriously had to FORCE myself to go the past two times...gah...but I figured I need to get my gen ed done as soon as I can, and I might as well take more classes while I have my scholarships and stuff....*sigh*

I just CAN'T wait for 2nd session when I have frisbee and hip hop :)

College.....Meh

So I think I've finally settled in as a 'college student'...ha. The work load is DEFINITELY a ton more than traditional high school, and now that I've found a steady job....it's not much better XD. So far I've written two 6 page essays (one being a research paper) and 2 'grammar collections' which include 4 different analyses of 4 different examples of rhetorical skills. -.- A butt load I know, at least math is pretty easy for me still, and Chinese is ok, memorizing characters can be a butt, but so far I'm managing pretty well. :) Well time for class!!

BEST book EVER!!!!!!

Oh my gosh! Every time I finish a book I feel so...empty and yet so fulfilled. Well with this book I have to say I am feeling SOOOOO empty!! I absolutely LOVED this book! And the worst part is, is that I KNOW it's not over! BUT I have to wait until next May to find out how the story progresses! :( And then after I finish that I know I'll have to wait again to find out how it ends! I'm sure by now you're wondering what book it is exactly that I'm talking about huh? Hehe well it's called 'Divergent' by Veronica Roth. I TOTALLY and WHOLEHEARTEDLY recommend this book to ANYONE!! It's sooo freakin good! It kept me turning page after page, only stopping for school and sleep. If you liked the 'Hunger Games' series...you'll love this series too!! :D

19th BIRTHDAY!!!!!

YUP it's now official!! I'm 19 years old!! Almost been on this Earth for 2 decades ha! XD I have to say though, birthdays seemed to be a bigger deal when we were younger, now that we're OLD not so much lol. We used to do so much for our long awaited bdays that only came once a year...now they feel like any other day...at least mine do :P But still it's nice to get a cake with your name, presents, and plenty of birthday attention ;D

Settling In....(freaked out)

Well it's like the 4th week of college now?..For me at least :P Things are finally settling in, and I'm starting to get into that 'groove' of things. One thing that really freaks me out right now, is anticipating having to write those 'college' essays...I've never been one who really like 'grammatical essays', I'm fine with writing, but when you tell me I have to follow certain guidelines and formatting and all that stuff I just blank. I've always detested grammar and everything associated with it...and yet I'm in WRTG 2010 (basically honors). Hm...I wonder how smart of a decision that was..but then again if I took WRTG 1210 I'd still eventually have to take 2010, so why not get it over with to start? Right?...Right. My favorite class by far is my Asian Civ 1210 class, it's just like my Humanities class last year, but focused on Asia :). All the class is, is lecturing + notes, with essays for midterms and finals...which again get me uncomfortable, but I'll manage somehow...I think I'll be going to this placed called the 'Writing Center' multiple times this semest XD.

YaY...CoLLeGe!!

Okay, so who's ready for college?? I know I am!!! ^.^ I have to say it's gonna be weird going to classes in different buildings, and in different rooms. Ha. The classrooms looked so different from high school + it's a completely foreign environment! Well, I guess I'll get used to it after the first week ha...at least that's what I'm hoping....all I can say is that I hope I can meet a ton of people, and make lots of new friends, to add to my pool of already awesome friends...with very few exceptions. (these exceptions would not be considered my friends...ha)

Work....Happy or Sad??

*Sigh* Got off work early again today, most days I don't really mind, but when I get off six hours early I get kinda bugged...why?? Because EVERY time I work I get off early, and today I was actually looking forward to working all day, but no I worked three hours, then went home...-.- And I actually got pumped up to work too...gah I guess that's just my like.

Only good thing is that now I won't be crouching, standing, and walking all day. Being a LONG time dancer, my joints are already crappy, but all that bending and everything my knee + ankle were starting to give way DX....Nonetheless it doesn't deter me from wanting to dance haha! Guess it's just something I was born with...or maybe it was trained into me...nah that implies that dancing is working...which I guess in a sense it is, but it's work that I love! ;)

All about the S.W.A.G.!

Oh my heck! I love partying all day with people I love!! ^.^

Got ready for school. Swag.
Just ate a granola bar. Swag.
Bahaha oh man, haven't laughed like that in sooooo long!!

So there's about two weeks left before college starts, I'm way excited to get started on new classes and to see how the college environment is, but I don't know how excited I will be having to not know anyone in ANY of my classes...maybe I'll have/get a special surprise and know someone in one of my classes!! *hopeful*

Anyways I have had the urge to dance ALL day, not just like party dance, like LEGIT dance. I'm talking full on warm-up, technique, combos, all that good stuff that'll leave you so sore the next day. I feel soooo outta shape, and it SUCKS! I wish I was still on DC...sad to say, but man I miss those summer practices now :(, but I ain't missing those early mornings haha!

This is gonna be an amazing rest of the year! I can just tell already!! Things are going great, everything that needed settling is settled, and new adventures are about to begin!!

The sky is the limit!!

The road to the Future*

Only about a month left until college classes start! O.O Way nervous/excited, but kinda bummed that I won't be seeing everyone probly as often as what I would like :/. I think I've pretty much got my schedule figured out though...hopefully anyways haha, but so far, I'm pretty excited to go to class, and to have a much shorter schedule ^.^

*sigh*..the life of a teen

How many ups && downs can one teen go through? That answer is apparently infinite, neither is there a set number of times in a day...:/ but hey I'm sure everyone loves stress, drama, emotions going hay-wire, slaps to the face (figuratively speaking), & whatever else happens to be thrown at you right?..WRONG!! I would give almost anything to avoid stuff like that, but somehow it always finds a way to weave itself into our lives, like a stealthy EVIL ninja...haha but everyone knows that I'm the most awesomest ninja out there ;P. But any-whoo all downs have to change direction eventually right?...RIGHT! :) As the wise people say, we wouldn't know the values of our ups without our downs. So in the meantime everyone else out there having a rough time, hang in there the rough times will pass :).

WOOT

Haha wow!! That was a fun day, first time watching a super bowl game....and it was GREAT!! I've decided that I like watching football, it's actually a lot of fun! XD
*sigh* I guess I've conformed like every other super bowl watching addict haha I'm a fan of the super bowl! :P

That is all.